Think I have been in tears every day. Hairdresser came on Monday, was in tears. Neighbour popped in, was in tears. Had to call out ambulance again but of course they could do nothing. Optician came while ambulance was here … rearranged to come back tomorrow. My eyes have blurred over so I can’t see properly on top of everything else. I do hope it is just because I badly need new spectacles and not because of the drugs. Been feeling very desperate. Friends have been here a lot, once to the early hours. Had to phone a friend in the middle of the night (first time).
Phoned private hospital and discovered GP had referred me to nephrology instead of neurology!! It transpires that there are in fact no private neurologists in Aberdeen, so now referred to Dundee (an hour away). Appointment the end of March. NHS referral to neurology remains in pipeline but usually a three month wait. Some days just a blur … felt I had been hit between the eyes and was wandering about in a daze for three days … something must have happened at the front of my brain. Phoned GP surgery and informed them of this. GP did offer to come out but I said there wasn’t much point. He was here last week.
Pressure on brain and lungs very bad, unable to breathe though oxygen levels normal. I think it is the muscles round the lungs that do not work properly … just like most of my muscles … and this gives the feeling that I can’t breathe. Pressure lifted yesterday so I am very relieved. Today has been easier too. I have bought an incentive spirometer to encourage breathing but not sure how much help it will be. Had to cancel dentist again … I have had to cancel so many appointments these past few years. It is going to take a huge amount of effort to cope with the journey to Dundee (by train) so I plan to stay in a hotel and that will allow me to rest before seeing the consultant the next day. Will hire a wheelchair … what a state of affairs. Can’t even be sure I can walk from taxi to train or from hotel lobby to room. Friends coming with me of course.